Its raining,, like a cow pissing on a flat rock

 

My dad said, "Don't make me beat you with a stick.".

(Seems like he said it every day)

 

"Colder than a witch's ear"

 

If you had a half a brain you'd be dangerous..Stupidity is free so everyone can afford it....

 

The bit about the brass monkey is an "urban legend"...You can read about it on a site for that on the internet somewhere (but I have forgotten where...)

Anyway, here's a couple I saw on the way to Dallas last week:

"It's not how you pick your nose, it's where you put the booger"

and

"Middle Finger Racing", like a company logo in someone's rear window...

 

We must not forget:

the slacker who is "pi$$ing on the wheels of progress"

or the moron who would "f##k up a wet dream"

 

Heard this one today:

No matter how thin you slice it, it's still baloney.

 

Busier than a one legged man in an a$$ kickin' contest.
or
Busier than a one armed paper hanger.



------------------
97 std. long bed
cat back
2-4 Ground Force drop

Pretty plain mono-chrome white.

 

Here is a couple that i use on people

When you went to school did a short bus or a long bus pick you up.

and

You fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.

 

Either sh@t or get off the pot

 

not only did they hit every branch on the way down, but they were beat with the largest branch when they hit the ground.

and for the record, my radio doesn't pick up all the stations!

 

A girl who sleeps around = she gives more rides than greyhound.
Sweet tea is the only tea in my opinion. My sister somehow manages to drink it unsweetened>She always has been a little off.

 

I've got nothing but respect for you... and very little of that.

- or -

Sorry, I refuse to enter a battle of wits against an unarmed opponent.

 

DEATH IS NATURES WAY OF TELLING US TO SLOW DOWN!

------------------
2001 F-150 4X4 Supercab
Arizona Beige clearcoat
XLT 139" WB style side
5.4L V8 4-SPD AUTO O/D
3.55 LIMITED SLIP AXLE
6500# GVWR PACKAGE
17" ALUM WHEELS
OFF ROAD 4X4 EQUIP GROUP
TOW GROUP CLASS III
SLIDING REAR WINDOW
FORD BED LINER
FORD BUG SHIELD
FORD STEPS

MODS:
AIRAID FIPK
SUPERCHIP(FLIP CHIP)
ROLL & LOCK TONNEAU

 

a friend of mine's favorite comment on the weather or on a woman.


IT'S/SHE'S HOTTIER THEN A HALF-F**KED FOX IN A FOREST FIRE!