" Did your parents have any kids that lived?"



BREW

 

LMAO!!!!! Damn Jersey people...

 

"Put a hole in it and *** it." Referring to some screwed up part at work.

"Pound to fit, paint to match." Referring to the same part that I have some how saved and passed along to paint.

 

I love this one... If there is no grass on the playing field, flip it over and play in the mud....

 

Is it Vietnam yet?

 

Love the quotes that make no sense at all. Get weird looks from people.
"You look more flustered than a barefoot squirrel in a tire store!"

 

I have a big sticker on the back of my toolbox at work that says
"We can fix broke but we can't fix stupid"

Another one I like that a guy at work always says: "That boy is from the shallow end of the gene pool".

Also: "I have tried to live my life so that my family would love me and my friends respect me. The others can do whatever the hell they please." (John Wayne)

Sorry about the crappy pic. I'll update it tomorrow

 

Well, aint that a b*tch

Looks fade, but stupid stays

ahh, that'll buff right out

"Whats that noise?", "Doesnt sound healthy, does it, better turn the radio up", (one of my friends when we were in his monte carlo)

this sticker we had on the old desk at work, "Its cute how you think Im listening"

and the all time #1 "Hey watch this!"

 

If it has t*ts, an engine or a roof it will cost you

My Uncle

 

"Thank god Im a country boy"

 

"Ya just caint change the spots on an elephant"

"Like a midget at a urinal...I'm gonna have to stay on my toes"

"Like a blind man at an orgy, I'm gonna have to feel my way through it."


Ive got more, I just can't think of them right now

 

Is it measure twice and cut once, or measure once and cut twice? Well, that's what wood putty is for...

 

All of Yogi Berra's quotes...

but then there's Brittany Spears (Master of Geography, BTW):
"I like to travel to lots of overseas places like Canada and Mexico"...
(Can you say BLONDE???)

Many more (like George Carlin ones), but way too many to list...

 

I am so smart, smrt. I mean smart

 

*Walking hunched over holding my back* , Manager; "Whats wrong?", Me; "Oh its my back, been carrying the company for too long"