Joke on using drive up ATM's

Thread Tools
 
Search this Thread
 
Old Mar 30, 2005 | 07:55 PM
  #1  
kingfish51's Avatar
Thread Starter
|
Senior Member
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 6,550
Likes: 2
From: Mount Airy,MD
Joke on using drive up ATM's

SUBJECT: USING ATMS A sign in the bank lobby reads: "Please note that this bank is installing new Drive-through teller machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts. After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."


MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.


FEMALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided.
23. Give appropriate look at the irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release parking brake.
 
Reply
Old Mar 30, 2005 | 10:53 PM
  #2  
dean1614's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 164
Likes: 0
From: katrina's waste land
ATM

I thought this was going to be a question like "why is there brail dots next to the numbers, on a drive up ATM?"
 
Reply
Old Mar 30, 2005 | 11:16 PM
  #3  
PSS-Mag's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 891
Likes: 1
From: Lost some where in the middle of the Ozark Mountains!
^^^^LOL^^^

I have always wondered that too...

This is a funny thread altogether.
 
Reply
Old Mar 30, 2005 | 11:36 PM
  #4  
paulv107's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 271
Likes: 0
From: N. Florida
Working on ATM's, I really do see things like that. And they always seem to do that when I am waiting on them so I can take the machine out of service to work on it. I have actually seen people take up to 2 or 3 minutes to do a transaction. This especially happens when they are making a deposit. It takes forever to do the transaction.

Trust me, I have seen it all

As for the Braille on the buttons, I have absolutely no idea either.
 
Reply
Old Mar 31, 2005 | 12:14 AM
  #5  
lees99f150's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 1,921
Likes: 0
From: Susquehanna Valley, pa.
what about the tommy boy trick. backing up the car with the door open and hitting the machine with it.
 
Reply
Old Mar 31, 2005 | 09:23 AM
  #6  
SAJEFFC's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 1,565
Likes: 1
From: San Antonio Tx
I love it, watched that happen this morning at my bank!
 
Reply
Old Mar 31, 2005 | 04:25 PM
  #7  
Dad's Hoss's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 217
Likes: 0
From: Cheyenne, WY
oh that was hillarious!
 
Reply

Trending Topics

Old Mar 31, 2005 | 04:37 PM
  #8  
ccla's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Feb 1999
Posts: 1,209
Likes: 0
From: Baton Rouge, La
Just in case its an honest question

Braille on drive up atms can be explained as a cost cutting measure in the manufacturing process. Why make a Drive up atm and a lobby atm when One type or model can do both. The braille is there in case its gonna be a lobby or grocery store model.
 
Reply
Old Mar 31, 2005 | 04:42 PM
  #9  
closer9's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 984
Likes: 0
From: SW MO
I like the braille on the entrance/exit signs on the outside of restaraunts, (Long John Silver's comes to mind). I've always thought if you could find the sign on your own you didn't need the braille...

BTW, great post...!
 
Reply
Old Mar 31, 2005 | 04:44 PM
  #10  
PSS-Mag's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 891
Likes: 1
From: Lost some where in the middle of the Ozark Mountains!
Intersting... I would have thought that it would be different units. One to with stand the weather and abuse, then the other indoor model not so rigid and water tight.
 
Reply
Old Mar 31, 2005 | 04:47 PM
  #11  
vader716's Avatar
Senior Member
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 2,079
Likes: 0
From: Pikesville, MD
Originally posted by ccla
Just in case its an honest question

Braille on drive up atms can be explained as a cost cutting measure in the manufacturing process. Why make a Drive up atm and a lobby atm when One type or model can do both. The braille is there in case its gonna be a lobby or grocery store model.
Saved me from posting....why make two key pads...

of course maybe the drive through is different...instead of the pads saying "1,2,3, enter, cancel, etc" in braille it probably says "you are going to get run over, go to the other side of the building"
 
Reply




All times are GMT -4. The time now is 07:26 AM.