Found this on another web site...This guy must be on crack or something.....LOL I'd like to know where he gets his cars dyno'd at....LOL. ENJOY!


I'D SMOKE YOUR ***
by Dr. Puddrew, 26, male
Topic: Car Racing - Street

November 13, 2001

This is for all you bad-boy posers out there that own your little itty bitty crap boxes and race them around vs. other crap boxes and think your all cool, tough and fast. Preludes, Integras, Mustangs, Civics, Camaros are all garbage. Guys come up to me wanting to race and I just laugh at them... why would I want to race a piece of crap not even worth my exhaust fumes. Supras, Corvettes even porche's are all a waste of time too. God people your cars all suck ***. Even with all your stickers get a grip... you can't beat me.

I'll lay it on you... this beast that I've got.

Are you ready? You've probably blown your load a few times with anticipation. 1995 Dodge Stealth RT TT. Black on black. I know, I know what your thinking. WOH! I wish I could be that guy..and hey! I can't blame you...I love being me. Well enough of that... I can already feel the tears of jelousy... on to the race.

As I mentioned before All the cars that you people reading this own, are a waste of my time. All of you...even those of you with imaginary cars, hell I'd smoke them too.

O.k. Here's the Story:

I was hanging out at my garage talking to my own personal mechanic, when he mentions some guy with a TT skyline who thinks his car is the **** and the fastest around... period. Well I've heard of this guy before, and I know for a fact not two month's earlier this particular TT Viper:

http://www.supercars.net/cars/2000@$Dodge%20SVS@$Viper%20Stryker%20Twin%20Turbob.html

took this guy by about 10 cars in the quarter and for about 20 grand in the end. We're not racing for peanuts here people... If you've got the fastest car and you start blabbering your mouth... someones gonna hear. Which is what seemed to be happening again.

So...through my mechanic...I meet with this guy and set it up. We both bring our cars and this guy just laughs when he sees my car. So I tell him...hey let's make it interesting and double the bet since he's so confident....and this guy is loaded anyways... and tell's me to make it an even 50g's. So fine... We both sign a contract to make it official. Upon signing the contract he tells me he just wiped a TT Viper by a car length in the quarter, and crushed him on the oval (1 mile). I thought about reconsidering, but hell no...it's only a Skyline.

I heard through the grape vine that the Skyline was pushing 1000+ hp which made my mechanic nervous. But I told him...Yeah it's a lot of horepower but the thing is huge...weighs 3500 pounds empty atleast.... on to the race...

The Race:

The race takes place in Nevada, right around the corner from the Chicken Ranch actually. So I bring my mechanic with me for company...cause it's a long drive from Toronto, to nevada...but I figured I needed the vacation anyways... so I got one of my mechanic to come with me... (plus it was his Rig pulling my car) so having a week to meet we kinda took our time. 4 days later we were there. Did some fine tuning on the car... everything seemed to be running good did a few test fly-by's everything seems good...and the heat mad the tires hook up real nice.

Finally the time comes...we meet up and this guy with the Skyline brings his whole team! The cops have come out too... both to watch and to set up a trap to measure how fast we'll be going because there was not track to race on ...just straight road.

So the guy fires up his Skyline...and I must say it sounds good... until I start up mine. There is absolutely nothg stock about my car. Not even the motor. The Stealth comes with a stock v6 3.0 litre. Mine has a modified Z06 engine that was taken apart...bored polished and a whole lot of other stuff tat I don't know about... aparently...engine alone puts out 750 hp and about 800 lbs of torque without the Turbos... nice eh? took f'n 6 month's to build! The body of the car has been Remolded because th origian was too heavy...even the frame has ben refitted... basically after all the mofications the cars weight was dropped 600 lbs.
With the Turbos I'm pushing 1050 hp 1000 lbs of torque!....add nos to that mixture and this is the #1 bad boy on the block with 1300+ hp/ 1250 lbs of torque at 3150 lbs.

We lined up...we were both revving like mad.... (both all wheel drive) suddenly the light goes green. The pull of my car almost knocks me out.... right off teh bad I pull on this guy. 1st gear, second gear, 3rd gear, 4th gear, ...and it's over... Didn't even use the spray no need...I was saving that for the finally... The quarter wasn't offically timed...but the radar said about 173 mph for me and 164 mph for him. Not bad for a crap box.
It was a best two out of three race....and we tried again and it was the same result...I'd take him by 1.5 - 2 cars both times...

The only way he could make his money back was to beat me top end. By choice he set up first.... we're onl a strip of road that must be straight for 50 miles. The starting point is roughly a 2-2.5 miles away...and given the signal he get the go...and has that distance to bring her up to speed before passig through the speed trap.

So he goes.... and the first speed is posted 209 mph... not bad i think.... then it's my turn to go... 221 mph you can't imagine what this feels like unless you've been in a car at 200 mph+ cause 2 miles feels like it only takes seconds to go through. The guy tells me not bad.... and pulls ahead with a 226 mph.... apparently he hadn't used NOS the first time... oh really I mentioned to him...neither did I...and next post a 243 mph speed... after seeing that the guy conceeds... and i walk away with 50 g's.

So If you see me on the street...please have some respect... and don't try and race me... cause all your cars are crap...and just a waste of my time.

 

that has to rank as one of the stupidest of all time

 

Cause ya know that's a real concern on an AWD vehicle.

 

Well at least he did his math right. The AWD stealth did weigh 3700lbs.

What I want to know is how he fit a modified Z06 engine in there. Which weighs much more then 3.0L v6, and what he did to drop 600lbs, plus the wieght difference of the engine.

And while I'm at it. If you've seen those engine compartments you know there kinda cramped, how do you fit a twin turbo v-8 in there with a large enough intercooler to cool everything down enough, and not interfere with front wheel drive system?

and if your gonna race for 50 g's, wouldn't it be proper to take a camera, get some pictures, maybe even have proof so when you brag about it you can back it up.

Sounds to me like a load of BS, who's got the BS meter?

 

Here ya go.....

I was looking at the Supercars site under Lightning and it says we have 275 cubic inches.........hmmmmmm......thats strange I always thought it was 330

http://www.supercars.net/cars/2001@$Ford@$F150%20SVT%20Lightningc.html

 

LOL...yea right !! Try again....

 

The radar said he was going "about" 173mph

 

Doctor? He must of gone to school in Oakland. My southern California high school education could have written up a better story then that, without spell check.

I like how he mentions the cops coming out, where are the hancuffs? Maybe that is why he doesn't have pictures, they were confiscated after the race for evidence. Now he is trying to write this up with Bubba behind him.

 

LOL..but the distance wasnt oficially timed..yea..OK

Did you pull and pack the chute after each record breaking run ??

 

with enough money you can make any car that fast.

well, almost any car.

 

You got all this cash to build a car this fast DOC and you can't afford a tow vehicle?
Exactly which court of law would uphold this contract? Ya right a contract for committing a crime?

I now declare that I too am a Dr. and....what the heck I'm feeling generous....were all Dr.'s now!

 

HI!... I would just like to know how he bolted a ZO6 v-8 engine to a all wheel drive system made by DODGE and designed for a v-6 (bolt pattern)???????????????????????????? LOSER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

This doctor must be a proctologist hmmmmmm,maybe a self examination is in order.I doubt he will have a problem doing this exam as he seems to be all a** lol.

 

I thought the Chicken Ranch was in Texas (closed from what I've been told) and the Mustang Ranch was in Nevada. I guess he was trying to include fast women in his fast car story. This sounds like the "Every Which Way But Loose" movie turned into a car story. I wonder if his mechanic was Clyde (the orangutan). LMAO.

 

Glad you guys like the story....LOL....I dont even think its possible for a stealth to go 243MPH with or without 1000+HP. Wouldnt he need some major wind tunnel testing to get the aerodynamics right? Wish a coyote would have been crossing the road when he was on his "top speed" fly by...lol. I think this guy just got finished watching "The Fast and the Furious" LOL