"What? I was speeding? I thought you were racing me!"

"Sorry officer, I was just testing my nitrous out"

"I'm sorry about that officer but I have racing slicks on and need to do burnouts to get traction."

"Pedestrians have the right away? Are you sure? I thought cars did."

"Please don't lean on my truck. Your belt my scratch the paint"

Ok, can't think of anymore

 

"I'll stop twice at the next one"

 

"I didn't see you behind me. I was sopping up a spilled brew. Would you like one? I have 2 left out of my 12 pack."

 

Arrow, what arrow? I didn't even see the Indian.

Red Light, What red light? I didn't even see the Ho House.

Do you know Lt. (Fill in name here), he's my uncle.......

 

I bet my truck is fast than your patrol car. Wanna race biatch!

 

You guys are something else! <------shaking her head & grinning

 

What? Yes, I was racing Cowlady. Sure you pull me over but not her.

 

"I already took care of you guys this month ..."

 

"Hey ya doin', Porky? Here.........have a doughnut!"

 

License and registration? Sure, can you hold this beer while I get it out of my wallet......

 

"License - What license? - y'all mean my GUN license?"

rr

 

" Wow. I'm impressed!! You must have doin 120 mph to catch me"

 

"I'm sotally tober ossifer"

 

Yeah officer I know its a 55 limit but i was only doing 80

 

why are you so mad..?? i got here as fast as i could..