Sorry to hear about it. And don't think you could have changed anything. Alot of people who suffer from depression, show NO signs. Its hard enough to get help to the ones that do. If he wanted help or to talk, All he had to do was answer the phone. I wish condolences as you move through these next few days. As far as your daughter, I wouldnt say anything unless she asked. Then if she does, be as honest and as compassionate as you can.

 

He wont make it through the night, they are getting a team together to harvest his organs, he was a donor on his DL, this was the wishes of the wife too, as she did this with her sister last year as well. Family is coming in tonight to see him for the last time.

I was asked by the wife to check out the house, incase the inlaws wanted to go by there and get a few things from the old house. It was planned you can see. He laid on the floor with a blanket under his head and did it...... we cleaned it for the most part already, just a few drops and a spot about the size of a pop can are left, everything else picked right up..... put no power over there I'll have to run a cord over to get the job done later.....talked to a friend who worked with him and he stated that he got a text saying that his tools were put in his storage shed... he texted back you finally cleaning out the old house...he text back YES.....15 min later he did it. He said if he wouldn't have been going into the kids school he would have called back and talked to him.... you just never know what you last words will be to someone.....remember to tell your loved ones how you feel.... cause you never know.

 

I know what you are going through. I lost one of my friends this way as well. You have many questions, but no answers. Time will heal you.

 

My heart and prayers to the wife and kids...and to you. Tough to be involved like that without any power in the matter. Like others have said, until you get to that point, you have no clue.

Try not to be hard on yourself. Reach out for help if you need it.

go hug your wife/gf, and kids. And yourself.

 

Well the organ donation has started. I hear that you can help up to 20 people with this program.... It's one way for the family member to live on in others. Bone, skin, eyes, heart, lungs, kidneys, liver, ect ect science is a wonderful thing now days. He was a donor on his DL and the wife wanted it also....I guess it's the only upside to the story.

 

well from what you've given us so far, he had every intention of doing it, he was serious 'cause he didn't say anything and he planned it out (even with the blanket and stuff) to make clean up easier...



if it makes it any easier there's nothing you could have done to change the outcome or what happened...


I'm going to assume you are in the military or have access to a va hospital, now might be a good time for you to talk to someone...

 

All the damage has been done, it's time for the healing to start, the service will be Tues Evening. Time for the little one to start the rebuilding. The toughest part is just starting for the mom and the boyfriend, you can try all you want, but you can never take the place of a birth parent.

 

Well the end was last night. Everything went off smoothly, till we got to read the message board and someone posted a nasty gram on the web site, I'll post it on here later.....all the family in town and to whom ever saw it , it was the worst thing I think could ever have been posted.... it takes some real nerve, and lack of back bone....trust me even if you didn't know the guy, you can see that this wasn't right.

 

here are the comments that were wrote on the guest blog online

In reviewing Jeff's life he was hell-bound/destined to give up when things got bad. He threatened suicide last year and then was talked out of it. When Jeff hit rock bottom...there was no place to turn and he violently exited this Earth by taking his own life. We can only feel for his children and hopefully soothe their pain for the loss of their Daddy. His ex-wife is certainly a winner for doing what she did and malicious as she is I hope she enjoys paying all the medical bills/expenses for her husband's actions. Jeff got his revenge on her but the pain on his own children will be forever lasting. Famfriend


must be a REAL family friend right

 

Wow... what a jacka$$

 

Sorry to hear about your friends, we personally just lost a Officer over the weekend the same way. Good luck man

 

Maybe this person is in pain as well, and has no way to express it. Suicide is an awful thing and many folks don't really know how to handle it.

My father did it just a few months ago, even as an older person (I'm 39, and he was 65 or so) I still don't know what to think. He did have COPD and was having trouble, but could have at least call and said goodbye or something, maybe a nice knowing you, or I'm glad you grew up and have a good life or something to that effect. Oh well, was a POS most of my life, why would I expect a selfish thing like suicide to be any different.

Well hate to ramble on, hope the family can get past this, I know it stays with you forever but sometime a few good memories do come out. I will never forget our fishing trips and going to the motorcycle races, talking guns, and knifes and other crap.

Don't know if any of this helps, just thought I would put my .02 cents worth.