1) ban the production of those awful little squishy orange-colored peanut-shaped marshmallow candies called "Circus Peanuts"
Along with all other useless candy such as candy corn, peanut butter kisses, marshmallow Easter bunnies and any other candy derived from candle wax.
2) ban the production of "fruity iced tea" such as peach, rasberry, etc. What's next? kiwi-passionfruit-orange-strawberry-banana tea! If you want tea then get tea, if you want guava juice then get guava juice.
3) mandate truthful, non-discreet feminine hygiene product commercials with more imaginitive products. "Gee Mom, when I use my new FDS Roll-On my boyfriend isn't so eager to roll the windows down at the drive-in and I really have a ball puttin it on"
4) mandate some pizzazz on foreign clone- mobiles (Accord, Camry, etc.) such as alloy wheels, body side moldings, or at least pinstripes. I would also put a 5 year moratorium on beige, green, and white paint on these cars.
5) require that parents take responsibility for their children and abandon this "If I punish them too severly, they will become insecure" take on discipline. SPARE the rod, SPOIL the child I say! You will be punished for any crime committed by your spoiled child until they are of legal age.
6) mandate hanging as punishment for ALL violent crimes, min 5yrs. for any other crime then 10 then 20 and eliminate all loopholes for getting out early. Jail would be jail, not club paradise.
7) legalize, regulate, and tax drugs so we can finally beat them
8) require Lifetime to show movies where the husband actually lives at the end
9) appoint Dennis Miller as Secretary of Reality in case I get out of line
10) Britney Spears, Backstreet Boys, N'Sync, nuff said

I could go on and on but I hate typing and I need another pain pill.

What would you do?

 

I happen to like flavored ice tea. And if I was king, it would mean that I wasn't in retail anymore there for I would be very happy. And would try to spread the happiness b/c some people are just to sad and depressing.

------------------
black 97' x-cab 4x4, 5 speed 4.6, black westin nerf bars, 6 cd changer and a 12 premier sub, pilot ground searchers, borla SS split rear exhaust, v-tech oval side window covers


soon: fipk, chip, rims (the ones I want are $2k with tires, I need more money)

 

If you became king ban Long Distance Company commercials. They are real annoying. If you could accomplish nothing else but that one thing, you would be a hero!

 

If I were King, I would...Get me some of those pain pills that seacrow's dentist gave him! He is having toooooooo much fun! j.b.

 

I would post tele-marketers home telephone numbers as well as their personal schedules so I could call at all the "perfect times" they call me.

I must tell 2 or 3 a day that I have recently deceased or ask if they can put new vinyl siding on a brick apartment building without the owners permission.

 

If I was king.....
1) Well, Chevy and Dodge would be out of business and considered a forbidden word.
2) Any musician not able to play their own instrument (ie. boy bands and teeny boppers) would also be banned to only sell underground.
3) I would not have to work.
4) I would also be sharing some of those pain killers of Seacrows.
5) F-150's would be on the flag.
Yeah, I think thats it for now. Good thing I'm not king huh?!?

Bones

------------------
2000 F-150, XLT, 4X2, Ext. Cab, S/B, 4.6L, 3.55 L/S, Tow Package, Sony CDX-C7050X Head Unit, 6.5' Sony Three Way Speakers In Each Door. Hopefully An Amp And 12' Sub Soon.

Future Mods: NONE, I'm broke.

 

If I were king, I would get an indoor pool filled with Doritos chips and a huge 2000 gallon tank filled with 7up outside. I'd have a straw (equipped with a pump) that would bring my drink to my rubber dingy (on top of my Dorito pool). I would sit naked on my boat and watch every Simpson cartoon.

hmmmm, replace 7up with beer and doritos with salted peanuts on weekends,...



------------------
Formerly known as 4byFord

Check out my site: eph1fifty.cjb.net My email: eph1fifty@hotmail.com
1997 F150 4x4 XLT with ORP 4.2L V6 and 5-speed manual.

 

Hey, eph1fifty, that sounds better than a Nacho Hat!!!

If I were King...I'd make everyone learn high-school-level physics and make them watch "Blood on the Highway" before getting their driver's licenses. Probably wouldn't change the world, but it's a start...

 

If i were KING:
1: promote Bill & Hillary to the rank of, "lowly knaves"
2: promote Al Gore to the rank of , Court Jester
3: pardon Edwin Edwards, only to **** off the entire federal government (who have been pissing me off my entire life)

 

Hey Eph1fifty,
When you are king can I come and swim in your Dorito pool? Also is it going to be Nacho Cheese or Cooler ranch? Maybe a mix of both? If you can do that you got my vote for king.

Bones

------------------
2000 F-150, XLT, 4X2, Ext. Cab, S/B, 4.6L, 3.55 L/S, Tow Package, Sony CDX-C7050X Head Unit, 6.5' Sony Three Way Speakers In Each Door. Hopefully An Amp And 12' Sub Soon.

Future Mods: NONE, I'm broke.

 

Oh yeah, I would also make Lortab pain pills part of the USDA recommended daily intake of nutrients.

 

I actually would want to KEEP Chevy and Dodge.
Without them Ford service depts would be slacking off more than ever and Ford would have no motivation to make a better more kick azz truck.
I would reduce the federal government to the powers granted by the consitution.

 

I would Have the boy bands executed. I can't stand that bubble gum crap. I'd also make the girl bands my slaves.

BBQ- Do you really think ol EWE is gonna spend time in jail?? I know If I was him, I'd already be living on the Beach in a non-extradiction country. He must have his own private jet and he's like what 70? I mean he's got like 10 years left he should go on the lam.

 

CCLA, he will probably get house arrest with one of those ankle bracelets (Rolex, of course). the feds have probably figuired that "Candy" is aging him quicker than they ever could in one of their country clubs. but, what a way to go!!

 

If I were king... I'd drive a lightning