A snake just ate my frog!!
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Joined: Jan 2006
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Upon encountering a snake in the Area of Operation (AO):
* Paratrooper: Kills the snake.
* Armor: Runs over snake, giggles, and looks for more snakes.
* Infantry: "Look, a putty cat. Come 'ere kitty . . . Ouch! Hey, that's not a kitty cat."
* Infantry (alt): "Ugh! Me see snake. Me like snake. Ouch! Me no like snake."
* Army Aviation: Has GPS grid to snake. Couldn't find snake. Back to base for crew rest and the club and some sort of drink called "The Snake"
* Ranger: Plays with the snake, then eats it.
* Ranger (alt): Assaults the snake's home and secures it for use by friendly snakes.
* SEAL: Expends all ammunition, several grenades and calls for naval gunfire in a failed attempt to kill the snake. The snake bites the SEAL then retreats to safety.
* Corps Artillery: Kills snake, but in the process kills several hundred civilians with a massive TOT with three FA BDEs in support. Mission is considered a success and all participants are awarded Silver Stars. (Cooks, Mechanics, Legal Clerks etc.)
* Marine Recon: Follows the snake and gets lost
* Combat Controller: Guides the snake elsewhere.
* Pararescue: Wounds the snake in first encounter, then feverishly works to save the snake's life.
* Special Forces: Makes contact with the snake, builds rapport, wins its heart and mind, then trains it to kill other snakes.
* Paratrooper: Kills the snake.
* Armor: Runs over snake, giggles, and looks for more snakes.
* Infantry: "Look, a putty cat. Come 'ere kitty . . . Ouch! Hey, that's not a kitty cat."
* Infantry (alt): "Ugh! Me see snake. Me like snake. Ouch! Me no like snake."
* Army Aviation: Has GPS grid to snake. Couldn't find snake. Back to base for crew rest and the club and some sort of drink called "The Snake"
* Ranger: Plays with the snake, then eats it.
* Ranger (alt): Assaults the snake's home and secures it for use by friendly snakes.
* SEAL: Expends all ammunition, several grenades and calls for naval gunfire in a failed attempt to kill the snake. The snake bites the SEAL then retreats to safety.
* Corps Artillery: Kills snake, but in the process kills several hundred civilians with a massive TOT with three FA BDEs in support. Mission is considered a success and all participants are awarded Silver Stars. (Cooks, Mechanics, Legal Clerks etc.)
* Marine Recon: Follows the snake and gets lost
* Combat Controller: Guides the snake elsewhere.
* Pararescue: Wounds the snake in first encounter, then feverishly works to save the snake's life.
* Special Forces: Makes contact with the snake, builds rapport, wins its heart and mind, then trains it to kill other snakes.
Senior Member
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 365
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From: Rain Pit, Oregon
The Snake asserts the following items hereto with--
1. Snake was pursuing a disease laden Rat when he encountered the Frog.
2. Aforementioned Frog, with malice aforethought, did thereby viciously attempt to slime the Snake about the face and scales whilst hurling degrading and defamatory remarks.
3. Due to the barbaric nature of the assualt visited upon the Snake he was forced to take regrettable action.
4. Snake furthermore asserts that the Frog was likely acting in collusion with the Rat. The said Rat has a history of spreading diseases and pestilence and is know to frequent houses of ill repute. Thereby the Frog is arguably just as guilty and simply got what was coming to him.
5. The Snake would further charge that he was willfully attacked by a Shovel Wielding Maniac, bent on his destruction, and is therefore entitled to compensary damages. Snake seeks the amount of twenty five (25) million dollars (per each shovel strike)
6. Snake further warrants that any future attemps upon his life will be met with the "appropriate counter action".
1. Snake was pursuing a disease laden Rat when he encountered the Frog.
2. Aforementioned Frog, with malice aforethought, did thereby viciously attempt to slime the Snake about the face and scales whilst hurling degrading and defamatory remarks.
3. Due to the barbaric nature of the assualt visited upon the Snake he was forced to take regrettable action.
4. Snake furthermore asserts that the Frog was likely acting in collusion with the Rat. The said Rat has a history of spreading diseases and pestilence and is know to frequent houses of ill repute. Thereby the Frog is arguably just as guilty and simply got what was coming to him.
5. The Snake would further charge that he was willfully attacked by a Shovel Wielding Maniac, bent on his destruction, and is therefore entitled to compensary damages. Snake seeks the amount of twenty five (25) million dollars (per each shovel strike)
6. Snake further warrants that any future attemps upon his life will be met with the "appropriate counter action".
Senior Member
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 534
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From: Louisiana
Originally Posted by mountaineer02v8
I have no idea where that snake went after I missed the damn thing but best be sure, that snakes going down I say!
Look at the bright side, bro, at least the Mountineer wasn't involved in this escapade.... Oh, wait, now the snake is going to end up in the Mounty, forcing you ditch the shovel in favor of a Mossberg...
Oh, JTDeere, you must go and get pics...
Is it really possible that all this happens to one man out of the millions of folks out there? You need to write a book! 
Senior Member
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 6,494
Likes: 1
From: Northern CA
I can't believe this hasn't been asked, is the fugger dead or not? I can't imagine a snake biting a frog in half, I didn't even know they do that. Sad story, maybe now you'll make some real friends.
Senior Member
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 1,336
Likes: 1
From: Your moms house
WHAT KIND OF SNAKE WAS THAT ?!?!?!?If the frog is eaten in half like you say, that's one weird snake. Snakes tend to swallow there prey whole, they dont take bites.
...and Jim says I have an halucenagenic state of mind.
pffft, shaa, right.
Senior Member
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 3,009
Likes: 0
From: In a van down by the river
Originally Posted by jamzwayne
WHAT KIND OF SNAKE WAS THAT ?!?!?!?If the frog is eaten in half like you say, that's one weird snake. Snakes tend to swallow there prey whole, they dont take bites.
...and Jim says I have an halucenagenic state of mind.
pffft, shaa, right.
He said the snake was actually in half. He said the legs are jellow and the body is half the size it used to be. Which all makes sense because the digestive fluids and poisons in the snake start digesting the prey into mush to make it easier to swallow hole.
This is all so freaking grose and I'm very disturbed and need to throw away my donut now.
Duke
Sorry Duke
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Senior Member
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 26,080
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From: Burleson/Athens/Brownsboro, TX
Originally Posted by F150 Duke
This is all grose and disgusting. I'm trying to eat my donut this morning while reading and you guys have ruined it!!!!
He said the snake was actually in half. He said the legs are jellow and the body is half the size it used to be. Which all makes sense because the digestive fluids and poisons in the snake start digesting the prey into mush to make it easier to swallow hole.
This is all so freaking grose and I'm very disturbed and need to throw away my donut now.
Duke
He said the snake was actually in half. He said the legs are jellow and the body is half the size it used to be. Which all makes sense because the digestive fluids and poisons in the snake start digesting the prey into mush to make it easier to swallow hole.
This is all so freaking grose and I'm very disturbed and need to throw away my donut now.
Duke
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Jim
Jim