Naval Aviator gripe sheets and their responses from their Crew Chiefs

P= The problem logged by the pilot.
M= The solution and action taken by mechanics.


P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
M: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
----------------------------------------
P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
M: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
----------------------------------------
P: Something loose in c0ckpit.
M: Something tightened in c0ckpit.
----------------------------------------
P: Dead bugs on windshield.
M: Live bugs on back-order.
----------------------------------------
P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode
produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
M: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
----------------------------------------
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
M: Evidence removed.
----------------------------------------
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
M: DME volume set to more believable level.
----------------------------------------
P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
M: That's what they're for.
------------------------------------------
P: IFF inoperative.
M: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
----------------------------------------
P: Suspected crack in windshield.
M: Suspect you're right.
----------------------------------------
P: Number 3 engine missing.
M: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
----------------------------------------
P: Aircraft handles funny.
M: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
----------------------------------------
P: Target radar hums.
M: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
----------------------------------------
P: Mouse in c0ckpit.
M: Cat installed.
----------------------------------------
P: Noise coming from under instrument
panel. Sounds like a midget pounding
on something with a hammer.
M:Took hammer away from midget

 

That's awesome!! Congrats!!