cia-agent....ummmmmmm what happens if your wife reads the orig post? ...zap!

 

No worries there she isn't allowed out of the kitchen until 8pm and then straight to the bedroom.

 

Not me.

BUT.......

I wanna hang out with Adam from now on.

That sounds like an intertesting episode. I might print that out, since the wifey knows more about Adam then anyone else on the boards.

 

I can't beat EA's story, but I got a pucker-factor story too...

June 14, 1991- Having put foot to Saddam's butt, we were allowed to return to the good ol' US of A. We boarded one of Pam Am's 747's call "Clipper *Something* of the Sea". Having been in Germany when the Pan Am flight exploded over Lockerbie, Scotland- I got an uneasy feeling while boarding a Pan Am 747; it was a mixed bag having been also elated to be going home...

As we pushed back from the "gate" at King Adbul Aziz AFB in Saudi Arabia, the big 747 engines thundered to life, we roared down the runway, all 372 Soldiers, with 2 duffle bags and a ruck sack each. (That's a lot of weight) I thought, as we hurtled down the runway. 33 seconds, and 180 MPH later- we were off the ground- the cabin erupted in cheer. It was like 1:00 AM, we were supposed to leave at 10:00 PM..

We flew for a while, and as they do- the flight attendants brought out the grub- we ate like kings & queens.

Time passed, in the pitch black night, and 5 hours later we were nearing our destination, Rome, Italy. Daylight has just broken across the country, and we're descending... Funny, they haven't turned on the fasten your seat belt lights, or anything. We're coming down through the clouds, banking and descending... I can see the crops and the rows in the fields now... This is my second MAC flight, and first flight on a 747 (that thing is HUGE) but the first time I've ever seen this happen- we're still not being told to sit down, fasten seat belts or anything...

Now, I can see houses, cars, stripes on the roads- we're pretty GD low now. WTF? Oh well. I have my seat belt on.. Why are the FA's still walking around? They know better. Maybe on a 747 all that isn't necessary.

I'm sitting right by emergency exit door #2, just in front of the wing- and the stewardess' seats are right in front of me, facing us... They were getting their flags autographed, having rank insignia penned on them, etc..when one asked me to autograph hers. "Certainly." I said; "Do you have a pen?" The plane is still banking and descending. She gets right in front of me- and as she is handing me the pen and her flag. BOOOOOOM!

Something slammed into the bottom of the aircraft. The nose went up, engines roared and the stewardess fell on me, then got up. I was scared *****less. With the nose pointed up, the aircraft shuddered violently, I looked out the window over the wing and instead of seeing the horizon, I was looking directly at the ground. The plane appeared to be in a 90 degree bank. I was thinking (And probably saying out loud)- (Oh sh*t, oh sh*t, oh sh*t) As I looked around, the oxygen masks were hanging down; people were falling & getting up & fallign again. I braced myself for the impact. The way we were, we would certainly cart-wheel across the ground; but somehow- although I was scared to death, I had an eerie calmness come over me.

I closed my eyes, and I felt the plane rotate to a normal take-off/landing angle, slide gently to the right, then come to rest on the runway. The thrust reversers kicked in; real loud... We must be running out of runway and the big bird came to a halt...

We were all shaken & stirred. My legs felt like jelly, but I hadn't even stood on them yet... The stewardess (Don't ask me how they got into their seats and buckled so fast) got up and started clapping- "At least that got us down safely, let's give them a hand!" There were assorted groans & moans throughout the cabin. Yeah Right kinds of groans.

Seconds later I looked out the window to see 4 or 5 Poliza cars coming towards the plane at great speed. Ramps came from somewhere, and they opened all the doors on the port side of the aircraft (where I was sitting). They took the pilots off, and left us and the stewardesses sitting on the ground, on the tarmac for the next 9 hours. We were not allowed to go to the terminal; but they had plenty of food & drink & movies on the plane for us to watch during that 9 hours.

After about 3 hours they said we could get off the plane & stretch our legs, but we were not to go beyond the span of the wing in either direction.

When we got out, and looked, there were huge chunks of grass & mud, as well as branches and assorted vegetaion all over the plane's moving parts, stuck all in the landing gear, and in the elevators. If I had to guess, I'd say that we smacked into the ground when that loud "Boom" shook the plane, causing us to go up, over on our side, then back before settling on the ground...

Let me tell you- That'll make your rear-end pucker-up real good...

We still had more flying to do, and in that 9 hours, they found us another plane (Another Pan AM 747, that flew from Frankfurt, picked us up, then we flew on to JFK, then from there on to home.

 

She's doesn't know about CIA-Agent....

 

Oh, I forgot one! About 3 years ago, my Dad and I were sitting downstairs watching an episode of Jag on tv. He's sitting in his easy chair, and I'm laying in the floor next to the tv.

All of a sudden I hear tires squeeling and a "KA-THUMP" sound. The next thing you know, about 2 seconds later, the whole wall in the room we were in just explodes. All I hear is a deafening BOOM!, and I could see the walls coming down. A truck had just came through our house! It sounded like a stick of dynamite went off right there in the living room.

It hit a 500 lbs bookcase and threw it 10 feet across the room and hit me in the leg. It didn't break it, but it had a pump knot on it about 3 " high. I think it was fractured though, because I had problems out of that leg going on well over a year after the incedent. My Dad caught a bunch of debris which cut him up a little.

He got out lucky. There was a broken 2x4 that had split and came to a sharp point. And it stopped one inch before it got to where he was sitting. If it had went any further, well you know...

 

well yea... No I have nothing that would seem entertaining after these stories. You guys are out of my leaque..

Good stories I like them!

 

My face after reading this thread:

Adam, that is one hell of a story! It sounds like a good plot for a movie,, or a book even. It gave me a chuckle til you got to the part about the minefield...

cia- your airplane story scared me to pop tarts!! lol whoa...

As for me...hmmm. One that is not too big or anything, but that I recall...

I was in 7th grade and walking to my next class... I was walking by my history class. The classroom had no walls, it was open. I heard my history teacher say my name, and he asked if I could come there for a second. Instead of keeping on walking, I went back, walked over to him and asked him what he wanted. He gave me a confused look and told me he never said my name. To this day I think it was something supernatural, like somebody was looking out for me had I not turned around...I still wonder what was waiting for me if I didn't walk over to my teacher.

Was just strange...

 

One time, at band camp...

 

I have a bunch more stories. I suppose that having worked all over the world and done so much flying, it has to add up somehow.
Eventually you end up with some close calls.
Here's another one.

In 1991, I went out to China to do a job. No problems there, nice place and spent a few days in Hong Kong on the way back.
The job had overrun and this being the good old days of the oil industry, I had a full fare business class ticket.
I had flown out from London to HK on Cathay Pacific who I have to say were magnificent. Never had a better business class flight. Coming back, I could either go back on Cathay Pacific or British Airways as the ticket was changeable.
Having flown both, I opted to fly back on Cathay Pacific as well feeling that it was superior even though I do like to fly the flag when possible.

Anyhow, I forgot to mention, both flights stopped over in the Middle East, my flight being at Dubai.
So, the plane takes off from Hong Kong (the old Kai Tak airport - interesting) and I fly in luxury to Dubai. Lovely. We approach Dubai and come in to land as normal.
As we touch down and I'm looking out of the window, the airport is filled with troops. There's tanks, apc's Hummers, people running up and down etc. This is mildly disconcerting as it wasn't like this on the way out.
Suddenly, the pilot hits the afterburners (or whatever they have on a 747) and we rocket up again into a fairly impressive take off from the roll. The brakes didn't even go on.
Everyone looks a bit shocked by this time and when we level off the pilot comes on the tannoy.
He said "Ladies and Gentlemen, I have no idea what was happening at that airport but I didn't like the look of it so we didn't stay. Apologies for those of you supposed to be getting off, blah blah blah).
We carried on to Paris were we had to eventually refuel.
There we learnt that it was the morning that Saddam had invaded Kuwait and all the Middle East went onto alert.

The British Airways flight I could have taken as an alternative actually stopped off at Kuwait airport. There, it was caught up in the invasion and the passengers were held hostage as human shields by Saddam. The plane was destroyed.

Close Call

P.S. I was in Russia for the fall Gorbachev when Yeltsin surrounded the Kremlin with tanks.
Two years in Angola during their civil war.
The Balkans during Kosovo. All good clean fun as a civilian contractor for these two.
I worked on the Piper Alpha 2 weeks before it blew up killing 148 men.

Looking back, I've been quite lucky :o

 

oh yeah, well I loaded the steel roof and siding panels that went on the new chicken house down the road :o

 

@ Adam

 

A cat has 9 lives, how many do you have?

 

I think I have used them all up now, hence my "ghey" office job
I'm too old and fat now to do all that running around.

Someone once said to me that, when you are born, you have two bags.
One is full of luck and the other one is empty. That bag contains experience.
Eventually, you end up with the experience bag full but the luck bag is emptied out along the way.

I was offered a job with KBR not long ago in Iraq but this time I passed it up even though the money was excellent.
I don't need it anymore and hope to retire soon to enjoy what I have worked for.

 

I was offered a job by a company out of Houston, to go to Iraq. $110,000.00 year, tax free- with paid airline tickets home every 10 weeks, or three months... I thought about how I could get ahead with 220,000 tax free dolars coming in, in exchange for me givimg up two years of my life... Then I thought- "F" that. I'm staying my **** right here...

I was pleased by the offer, but- momma didn't raise any dummies. My black a$$ would stick out like a sore thumb over there- so there's no chance of me blending in, like a co=worker, who was hispanic, did.

He went... I haven't heard hide nor hair from him since July 2003- so his two year obligation is almost up~ if he's still alive...