I agree with Serotta as well..

I think that when you're registering your child, you should chose whether your child is to be disciplined via corporal punishment (And have that defined- IE, number of swats maximum with a paddle or other hard, flat instrument, and where on the body), or suspension. With that signed paper in the hands of the school's administration, there would be no lawsuits- and, if your child could not be disciplined to your liking at the school, then they can come home for your discipline- at a cost of your vacation days to sit there and parent them.

I told them I'd sign anything they needed- just don't call me for petty things that all kids do when you can correct the problem on the spot. The little stuff the school would call the house for, my Mom would never have heard about because the teacher would have (could have) squashed it at school, and I woulnd't be dumb-enough to subject myself to ANOTHER round of it, by telling my Mom that I got unruly with a teacher at school...

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In regards to my teenager- I call him my son, but he's not really- he's my brother-in-law that I've spent the better part of the last 11 years raising, under my roof, in my home, eating my food, using my toilet, goign to parent-teacher conferences, takign calls from the teachers, takign time to attend his school functions, spending my money on his school funds, lunch, banquets, fund-raisers, year books, etc.. so, he's just like a son. It's a long story how we ended up with him..

He can get belligerent- but he has been a lot better for this last 18 months.. But when I was tapping him on his butt, he straightened up quickly. He was waaaay out of line when we first got him. It used to take him from 5 PM - 1:00 AM to do his homework (intentionally slow, couldn't understand, lying & hiding homework- only for the zero's to show up on his progress report); A few well-placed swats and that ETA got cut to 8:00 PM.

I used to work nights, and I told him- if I ever come in this house and you're up doing homework again; I got something for your @$$...

I got home at 12:30 AM and he was doing a project with my wife (A big project). When I walked in the house he was crying like a little girl.. He was 14 at the time... I thought my wife had gotten him, I said "What's wrong with you boy?!" She said, "He just started crying when the truck pulled into the drive way". It was 12:30 AM and he knew he was supposed to be in bed when I got home (Most nights it'd be after 1 before I got home... He thought I was gonna get him~ but you see- that previous butt whipping was still fresh in his memory- and he was doign what he needed to do, to avoid another encounter.. He just didn't think it was going to take him that long to finish that project. Because of my wife, I let him slide that night... But, I told him he owed me... He's a little slow now-a-days (He's smellin' himself a little bit) but, when I tell him to do something, he s**ts me tiffany cuff-links...

Now, he's almost 17 and it just wouldn't feel right putting hands on a darn-near grown man; and- as I said- he's smellin' himself now and may think it's a good idea to hit me back... , and if he ever did that- God help him (dead), and me (prison)...

I got my last hands-on butt whipping when I was in the 6th grade; for him, it was necessary to go to 10th grade. Now we talk because it lowers the chance of a physical escalation. I didn't get him when he was young enough to REALLY get my punk in on him (He was being raised too softly) plus I never felt right spanking him because he wasn't my child- and you never know how far, is too far with an in-law.. But, the few times I did lay hands on him, I got his full & undivided attention- but I only stepped in when it was obvious that my wife and/or mother-in-law were not going to sway him.

He's still somewhat scared of me, and as expected- as he gets older he understands the reasoning behind why we were so tough (in his words) on him. But, he's a prime example of how not spanking him (early) allowed him to get off the beaten path...

 

Man, I couldn't tell you how many **** whoopin's I got as a kid. All I remember is my Dad had us (me, my bro, and my sis) bend over and he gave it all he had with a belt across our hind ends. I remember the switches, man I dreaded those. But THE BELT got the message across. I didn't know it then, but the reason my Dad whipped us so hard is because he loved us. If he didn't whip us, in his eyes, that meant he didn't love us. And we would have grown up heathens because of lack of discipline.. He told me that when I got old enough to understand. And I'm glad he raised me like he did.

 

Yeah- I couldn't tell you how many I got...

Man, I got licks from the time I was old enough to know what a whipping was - 12th grade.. Not that I was a bad child when I got older, but- I was just habitually late; and the choice was three licks or go to the office. I took the three licks... The teacher had no arm, so it was no biggie- plus, had she been able to hit harder, I may have been compelled to get my **** across campus faster; but- she couldn't so I didn't...

The rest came on the football field. That was coaches way of gettign us to keep our butts low on defense. If you were in a 3-point stance and had your butt high, if he got near you with the paddle **POW**. On the next play, you kept it down... and you remembered to wear your girdle pads too.

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And the switches?? Oh man- My grand-mother was like Zorro with a switch. What was worse was when they made you go to the "switch-tree" to get your own switch for your whipping. And, you better not come back with a little switch either...

That's a physical & mental whipping... But, I loved my folks to death- and I'm glad they raised me the way they did...

 

Phh... I dont know what you all are talking about...(16 to old or some crap like that) I'm grown, married, ben out of the house for over a decade, I have 2 kids! If I stepped out of line some how now, there is not a doubt in my mind that my dad would bust my ****, STILL!

 

Children are given to us for a very short time in this life. It is our responsibilty, to raise them to the point of being disciplined adults. Some will need spankings and some will not. A good and involved parent will know the difference in which kind of child theirs is.

On a humorous note: I've told the teachers in my church, " If on the first day of school, you take the first child to misbehave out to the parking lot and shoot the little so and so in front of everyone, the rest of the school year will be a piece of cake!"

 

I think thats were your opinions are differing from others. In my book of definitions physical violence and spankings are to completely different things. I associate physical violence with abuse, and spanking as a tool.

I got plenty of whoopings growing up. Mom was always a hand or wire coat hanger, never hard enough to do damage but the STING she had. My grandmother it was always always her cain except 2 times. Once she whacked me with a frying pan, another time she managed to side kick me off a chair. But again never hard enough to hurt.


Then I knew other kids who would actually flinch when a parent raised their hands.

Thats the difference between the 2, at least the way I see it.


Now when the time comes and I have a mini me running around, I have no clue how will handle it. But if he/she is anything like I see alot of duct tape and a kiddie leash in my future.




LOL. My grandma still whacks me her cain.

 

thats one of the main reasons we dont have kidzzzzzz you cant touch them or the teacher calls the cops and presto your in jail...the dective that lives across the street has told many stories of having to go to a school and then arrest the dad...mom...aunt..uncle...when i was a kid my dad would just STARE at you...that was bad enough...mom was the one with the "happy hairbrush" as we called it...zap!

 

I caught a beating (ok...spanking) every once in awhile. I deserved 99 percent of them, and I'm thankful I got them. At least my parents were around to make on the spot corrections when I needed them...a lot of kids aren't that lucky.

Will I do the same...I'd like to say yes, but I don't have any kids. I guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

 

Well I have two kids 6 and 2. I grew up and my parents had no problem with spanking when I needed it. So here are my feelings on the topic.

I do spank my kids but it is very infrequent. I have found that a strong voice and look immediately brings obedience. I am my 6 year old son's friend but I am first his father. If the lines ever get blurred I make sure to clarify them for him quickly.

Both children have gotten spanked less frequently as they age. In fact my son hasn't gotten a spanking in well over a year because when he got them when he was younger he must remember them being bad (barely tapped him but the action was enough). My daughter is developing the same way but she is more bull headed.

I understand the feelings about allowing teachers to spank but I'm against it. Too many of these teachers have grown up in homes that didn't teach them the proper way to discipline and consequently they aren't qualified to make decisions when its ok to hit. In fact if my son told me a teacher hit him, I'd probably Jamzwayne them. Best part is...we home school so I don't have that problem.

 

Personally I see nothing wrong with spanking a young child. I got spankings when I was young and look at me, I am ALL RIGHT!!!

However, the problem the way I see it, is there are some parents that just don’t know how to be a parent. A ex-good friend of mine is a perfect example, he and his wife are the type that continually state ”The next time you do that…” their kid knows that he can usually get away with stuff for a LONG time BUT once mommy and daddy freaks out he is in for a MAJOR *** whooping and I mean they freak out, not in physical abuse, but the screaming and ”We told you, we told you”

I finally had to say something one day when HE asked for my opinion, big mistake, anyway he asked me for my honest opinion of what I thought of him as a parent. So, I told him, he sucked as a parent because he is NOT consistent and can NOT ever seem to give his son any reasonable reason to ever listen to him or his nut case wife…

Like them moron parents in stores where their kids are screaming and/or running around out of control and/or slapping their parent. Sorry, if my daughter had ever tried slapping me around in the store I would have gave her a spanking in front of everybody.

I only had to spank my daughter once when she was approx. 5 or so. Never had to after that. The funny thing about it was I had really only patted her on the butt like 3 times, much lighter then when I played with her but she cried like I had taken a 2x4 to her. It was just the point that daddy was not happy with her. She was, and kind of still is, a big daddy’s girl so I think it hurt her feelings more then anything.

It was true like my parents would say ”This is going to hurt me more then you” of course as a kid your thinking ”How the hell is that?” Anyway, it broke my heart to see her cry like that. It lasted a good 5 – 10 minutes and about 30 minutes after that we played but you have to wait or the punishment means nothing.

She is a great kid and has never given me any problems. I don’t contribute that to one spanking but staying consistent, which sometimes would break my heart. To be a good parent you can NOT be your child’s best friend or buddy all the time, sometime you have to be the bad guy, the grown up and let them know THIS IS THE WAY IT IS PERIOD!

I agree that after about 8 years old or so is too old for spanking and if you do not have control of your child by that age you’re in for a very LONG life of disappointments…

There is NO DRUGS that replace the parent, the vast majority of the time, 95% if your child is not behaved it is because you LACK as a parent and NOT because your child has some mental problem that makes a shrink RICH, get over it, you suck as a parent, get help, read books, and stop ABUSING your child with drugs because you lack the guts to take the job of a parent seriously…

 

Well said XLT....sounds like my house....

I laughed when you said "but she cried like I had taken a 2x4 to her" because it is so true.

My kids will wrestle with me and we can really get going. Mommy gets mad ad Daddy for wrestling too rough. A few taps on the rear with my disapproval and you think I'd sent them to the hospital.

 

There are two things I don't want Teachers doing to my kid at school:

1. Hitting them.

2. Teaching them about "Their" Religious or Political beliefs.


Teach them Math, Science, History, etc. There's enough there to keep them busy.

 

Im 24 and would guess that I am close to some of the last that got spankings, before it started getting too dangerous for parents to punish their kids. I am definitely all for it, sure I hated my parents at the time for doing it, but I never did it again.

I never got it at school, but I remember seeing the paddle with the holes in it. And I also remember hearing the yelps of kids who did get it. It sure made me think twice about doing anything that might get me into the principals office.

 

I'm pretty much for it... In class this summer we learned the 'rules' Here in MD, as long as it's a spank with the hand that doesnt leave a red mark for longer than 8 hrs it's not abuse!!!

I try time-out & taking of toys, but sometimes it's gotta be a spank. Yet I am struggling with my lil ones.... today one started acting up & when I asked nicely, then not so nicely, then threatened a spank & it continued I gave a spank.... only to be told... 'that was little'... I really wanted to go for BIG, but I just grabbed him by the ear & warned 'you don't want to feel BIG'

UGH life with multiples is a constant challenge!

I know people from work would be surprised at what a softie I am, I'm usually such a harda$$ at work.

 

When I was growing up, if I did something stupid, I got my *** kicked for it. Before too long, the light bulb lit up and it dawned on me: Quit doing stupid stuff and you don't get beaten!

I think I turned out okay.