I posted this question i nthe programmers section but have determined that I cannot resolve my situation with a programmer so am bringing it here.

2005 F-150 5.4 w/edge programmer lvl 2, 4x4 3.73 gears, 265/70/17's. When driving in the hills I have an issue where when manually shifting to first gear there is a 1-1.5 second period where the transmission completely shifts out of gear. This is followed by a harsh shift into 1st that locks up the rear tires and will throw you foward against your seatbelt. The same coast/harsh shift scenario plays out in 4wd and 4wd low.

Is there any way to either remove the delay going into first gear or soften the shift into first so that it is not so jarring?