God I don't even know where the hell to start...

A friend and I have been trying to install my train horn that I ordered off eBay for a few weeks now. We had to abandon the project when we realized the eBay seller provided no 150psi-capable air tube with the other stuff. Well today I finally got the air tubes so my friend came over.

Anyway the first thing I needed to do was get the truck up closer to my garage where we were working, so I hopped in the truck (which had been setting in the driveway a few days) and went to start it. It started to sound like it was going to start but then I think I cut it off too early with the key and it died. So I tried starting it again but it just kept making a weak attempt to start and didn't start at all. It just kept grinding and grinding and grinding. I thought I might let it sit for a half hour, so I did (actually it was like 45 minutes) tried it then - no luck. So then my friend I hooked up jumper cables thinking the battery was the problem for the grinding (not enough power to start) we let the cars charge for about 15 minutes and my trucks battery guage finally got into the mid-area, so we tried starting it: same grinding sound. Battery problem? Probably not by now if the battery had half power. So then we didn't know what to do so we let it charge for a longer time, maybe 10 more minutes. Battery was even more charged by now. Tried starting it, and it did nothing but grind, grind, grind! Then I hopped in the truck and kept trying to start it (I tried Neutral, First, Reverse, etc.) and then the key turner thing started going wild! The key-turner deal started going 360' degrees all the way around - this is not something that happens normally! Then when the key-turner did stop, the truck wouldn't even make an attempt to start or even grind at that.

So now I don't know what's going on. I mean seriously, I DO NOT KNOW what the hell is going on with the goddamned truck. It pisses me off.

Starts to start > then starts grinding > keeps grinding > charge the battery up > grinds > key-turner goes over 360' degrees before stopping > truck fails to start or even grind.

I made no modifications to the truck whatsoever. Nothing was mechanically or cosmetically altered on it. I did not use any force or over-exertion by any means on the key-turner thing.

I don't know what to do.
OH YEAH and my stupid "Engine" and "Battery" lights are on now in my truck, glowing, so I guess even though the pattery has a good charge on it right now, the stupid little Engine and Battery LED's in the dash will slowly but surely drain it out.

Thank God I have a Buick Skylark, it doesn't give me all the **** this stupid '87 started doing for no reason.

Yay, now I get to call a tow truck to come out for $60+ and I get to bring it in to the good old expensive auto body shop whom will surely charge me at least $200+ just to look at the damn thing, let alone fix what's actually wrong. YIIIIIIIPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEE

I need some Prozac.

 

You also need a new ignition lock cylinder assembly, possibly a new actuator rod, and more than likely a new ignition switch. Get a Chiltons manual and start with the lock cylinder.

 

And, don't take it to a body shop for engine work.