Driving home a few minutes ago and a bird shat (***** in the past tense as a verb) through my moonroof onto my shoulder, bounced off my shoulder onto the center console and the drivers seat. Thank god it was a lumpy one and not straight liquid.

Now, of course, I've already cleaned and conditioned both twice with Lexol and once with 4-way but, I just wanted to propose that we move to strike birds from the earth.

We can accomplish this by simply shooting everyone that we see or, we can all pitch in and buy a satellite of some sorts that beams a lazer through they're feathery little heads when they take flight from their nests.

Birds are a nucence.

Also, I move that water fowl that are hunted for sport be omitted from the list so that the fish and game commission, along with the DUCKS UNLIMITED FOLKS, will still have something to do during those seasons.

Any other suggestions for killing off the bird population? I'm game. You'll have my financial backing.

Damn little bastard birds...


RP

 

What's worse is when a a bird's flight path crosses yours at just the right point that it flys into your open window. Talk about distracting the driver.

 

I will certainly try to do my part this year RP - starting September 1 when dove season opens!

 

 

That's why I never took the factory plastic covers off the seats and console.
Funny story......when it happens to someone else!!
BD

 

i,ll be over here with rocks shooting all the ones you scare over into texas brother...good hunting

 

Thanks for your loyal support in my qwest to irradicate birds. Rocks, bullets, cans, bottles, little brothers etc... feel free to throw ANYTHING THAT YOU THINK WILL KILL A BIRD!

**REWARD: DEAD OR ALIVE

$10,000 to the person or persons who bring the bird who shat through my moonroof onto my shoulder, onto my interior surface to justice. Must be able to proove that it is the same bird with stool sample. **

________

Yeah, always funny when it happens to the other guy. Just you wait Bronc. Next time I'm out west on business, I'll find your truck, and I'm bringing the big birds for some big poop. Don't worry, I'm only going to be feeding them soybeans and exlax. Muhahahahaha!


~~~ RP ~~~

 

got one thing to say......


Double barrel 12 guage

 

You're lucky in KY, if you were in Fla it could've been a pelican

(note: pelicans carry QUITE a load <and it's fish leftovers>)...

So did I mess up going for the roof over the entertainment center?

G

 

Well, you could go down to the local animal shelter, adopt all the felines in the building and drop them off along the path of your usual travels.

But somehow I don't perceive you to be a cat lover either.

How about scarecrows? You could bolt one down to the bed.

 

RP

Please immediately retract anything I said in previous posts about having things in common.

Poor lil' birdies......

Go read "The Silent Sky" by Eckert.

(About the extinction of the passenger pigeon in North America)

Betcha can't get to the end without a tear in your eye !!!

You ol' meanie.

 

Extinction. You said it, I didn't. That's what I'm after.

In the words of Metallica -- 'KILL EM' ALL'



Grrrrr...



The little birdy bastard did leave an ever-so-slight spot on my seat. I recleaned it this morning and reconditioned it and I appear to have removed 90% of it but, it's still there. I'm going to resort to a little more agressive approach when I get home - I'm going to use bleach.

I plan on taking the bleach (Chlorox) and evaporating the water out of it on the stove thus, I'll have a concentrated form that will take the green off a garden hose (unless you're using one of those funny looking yellow/blue ones). Using a metal bristled backporch grill cleaning brush, I'm going to scrub that bird shat out of the seat. I plan on repeating this action on each of the seats. I'll let you know how it turns out.

RP

(AUGUST FOOLS)

 

Hey, that pelican comment hits too close to home (no pun intended). I was in the water at the beach one time and a pelican dropped his load (quite literally) on my friend's head not five feet away from me. Wow, did I ever think twice before going in the water. And I always look up now before I get in.

 

These are wonderful stories!!!

Birds are so adorable How can you be mad???? I don't even have a sunroof for a bird to poo through I personally feel that it's a fair trade off....A little poo for a lot of sun

*****you know you were just dyin' to tell this story as you drove home*****

 

RP

August Fools.....

I can be a fool anytime.....no problemo !!