Why did the chicken cross the road?


BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure – right from Day One! – that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn’t about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don’t really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

**** CHENEY: Where’s my gun?

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken’s intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won’t realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he’s acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I’m going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he’s guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer’s Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I’ve not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can’t you people see the plain truth? That’s why they call it the ‘other side.’ Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like ‘the other side.’ That chicken should not be crossing the road. It’s as plain and as simple as that.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn’t ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn’t that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra…#@&&^(C%..........reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

 

Righteous, dude! - Og

 

Hahaha. All of those are so true!!!

 

pretty funny

 

LOL that made me crack up.

 

Repost!

https://www.f150online.com/forums/sh...d.php?t=336538

Actually Im just bitter because your getting more replys

 

Where's D?



https://www.f150online.com/forums/sh...d.php?t=336538

Another form.
https://www.f150online.com/forums/sh...d.php?t=313626

And even in a different form.
https://www.f150online.com/forums/sh...d.php?t=112545

 

Bugger

Sits back and waits for Dzervit to log on

 

Daveg99 The chicken crossed the road to see emailed naked pics and buy a new windshield. Jimbeams girlfriend kicked it with her shoe, and really pissed off the chicken. Can chickens use CB's? Wanna see some pics from a chickens point of view?

scott1981 The chicken crossed the road because the side he was on, had a bunch of jap trucks, and he did not want to be part of it. The chicken tried to reason with Smiggs, but we all know how that ended up.

Nuclearthreat The chicken crossed the road to get away from Obama bashers.

ManuelF150 The chicken crossed the road because because I logged him in my book. He will never come back due to my diligence.

Stealth The chicken crossed the road to be with the Unionized chickens that sit around and watch NASCAR whilst munching on Cheetos.

ThumperMx113 The chicken crossed the road because Justin @ Vmp told him it was faster than taking any other route.

Raptor Its my chicken, and its the fastest chicken ever. Even though the chicken was smaller than most others...

Raul The chicken crossed the road? What am I gonna eat for dinner now?

JBMX928 The chicken crossed the road to get one of my new sigs. He knew that I drive something other than an F150, and still sought me out.

Rock Pick The chicken thread has been closed! It does need to be known that the chicken dug his way under the road, and found many interesting varieties of igneous rocks and sediment. Each of you need to grow up.

Bigman I wanted to eat that chicken...even though it wanted to legalize marijuana.

RollingRock Catch that chicken, wash him, Clay him, PB SSR1 Green LC Flex, PB PP White LC Flex, PB BH BLack LC Flex, PB EX-P Blue LC Flex, PB Nattys Red, Hand Megs, HD legs and spurs...all while drinking beer from green bottle.

CrAz3D I have posted many threads about chickens. Did a US soldier throw that chicken to the other side?

Budha05STX Its probably Shines fault that the chicken had to cross the road.

bluejay432000 My rat dog scared the chicken away

Shinesintx The chicken finally listened my bible posts, and saw the truth. This is obviously why he decided to cross over.

MercedesTech teh ckiken krosd da rode...

Stxynpicks I told the chicken to cross the road so now im racist. (mSaLL150 addition)

Alon@modbargains.com The did not get run over due to his carbon fiber wallet. Any one else interested in a group buy of chickens?

My apologies to anyone who feels left out Purely unintentional on my part

 

Now that is funny, I don't care who you are

 

Awesome! I do feel left out, though----but it is the funniest thread response in a long, long time

TSC

 

Stxynpicks I told the chicken to cross the road so now im racist.

 

Aristotle: To actualize its potential.

Roseanne Barr: Urrrrrp. What chicken?

Roland Barthes: The chicken wanted to expose the myth of the road.

Wolfgang von Beethoven: What? Speak up.

Bill the Cat: Oop Ack. Ppthpt.

Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.

George Bush: To face a kinder, gentler thousand points of headlights.

Caesar: To come, to see, to conquer.

Candide: To cultivate its garden.

Joseph Conrad: Mistah Chicken, he dead.

Howard Cosell: It may very well have been one of the most astonishing events to grace the annals of history. An historic, unprecedented avian biped with the temerity to attempt such an herculean achievement formerly relegated to homo sapien pedestrians is truly a remarkable occurrence.

Salvador Dali: The fish.

Darwin: It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.

Thomas Dequincy: Because it ran out of opium.

Rene Descartes: It had sufficient reason to believe it was dreaming anyway.

Emily ****inson: Because it could not stop for death.

Bob Dylan: How many roads must one chicken cross?

Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.

Epicurus: For fun.

Paul Erdos: It was forced to do so by the chicken-hole principle.

Basil Fawlty: Oh, don't mind that chicken. It's from Barcelona.

Pierre de Fermat: I just don't have room here to give the full explanation.

Gerald R. Ford: It probably fell from an airplane and couldn't stop its forward
momentum.

Michel Foucault: It did so because the dicourse of crossing the road left it no choice; the police state was oppressing it.

Sigmund Freud: The chicken was obviously female and obviously interpreted the pole on which the crosswalk sign was mounted as a phallic symbol of which she was envious, selbstverstaendlich.

Robert Frost: To cross the road less traveled by.

Zsa Zsa Gabor: It probably crossed to get a better look at my legs, which,
thank goodness, are good, dahling.

Gilligan: The traffic started getting rough; the chicken had to cross. If not for the plumage of its peerless tail, the chicken would be lost. The chicken would be lost!

Johann Friedrich von Goethe: The eternal hen-principle made it do it.

Werner Heisenberg: We are not sure which side of the road the chicken was on, but it was moving very fast.

Ernest Hemingway: To die. In the rain.

David Hume: Out of custom and habit.

Saddam Hussein: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

Lee Iacocca: It found a better car, which was on the other side of the road.

John Paul Jones: It has not yet begun to cross!

James Joyce: Once upon a time, a nicens little chicken named baby tuckoo
crossed the road and met a moocow coming down...

Immanuel Kant: Because it was a duty.

Jacques Lacan: Because of its desire for object a.

H. P. Lovecraft: To escape the eldritch, cthonic, rugose, polypous, indescribably horrible abomination not from our space-time continuum.

Paul de Man: The chicken did not really cross the road because one side and the other are not really opposites in the first place.

Paul de Man (uncovered after his death): So no one would find out it wrote for a collaborationist Belgian newspaper during the early years of World War II.

Groucho Marx: Chicken? What's all this talk about chicken? Why, I had an uncle who thought he was a chicken. My aunt almost divorced him, but we needed the eggs.

Karl Marx: To escape the bourgeois middle-class struggle.

Moses: Know ye that it is unclean to eat the chicken that has crossed the road, and that the chicken that crosseth the road doth so for its own preservation.

Alfred E. Neumann: What? Me worry?

Newton: Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest. Chickens in motion tend to cross the road.

Jack Nicholson: 'Cause it (censored) wanted to. That's the (censored) reason.

J. Danforth Quayle: Ite sawe ae potatoee.

Ronald Reagan: Well, I forget.

William Shakespeare: I don't know why, but methinks I could rattle off a hundred-line soliloquy without much ado.

Sisyphus: Was it pushing a rock, too?

Socrates: To pick up some hemlock at the corner druggist.

The Sphinx: You tell me.

Mr. T: If you saw me coming, you'd cross the road too!

Margaret Thatcher: There was no alternative.

Mark Twain: The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.

George Washington: Actually, it crossed the Delaware with me back in 1776. But most history books don't reveal that I bunked with a birdie during the duration.

Mae West: I invited it to come up and see me sometime.

Walt Whitman: To cluck the song of itself.

 

You finally did something creative!

 

LOL shinestinx that is one of the best posts you've ever made. Very nicely done.


and to the OP it's nice to see some threads ripping all sides of the political world, not just one sided .