Fractured Dictionary

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Old Nov 19, 2005 | 05:20 AM
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Talking Fractured Dictionary

Arbitrator \ar'-bi-tray-ter\: A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonalds.

Avoidable \uh-voy'-duh-buhl\: What a bullfighter tries to do.

Baloney \buh-lo'-nee\: Where some hemlines fall.

Bernadette \burn'-a-det\: The act of torching a mortgage.

Burglarize \bur'-gler-ize\: What a crook sees with.

Control \kon-trol'\: A short, ugly inmate.

Counterfeiters \kown-ter-fit-ers\: Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.

Eclipse \e-klips'\: What an English barber does for a living.

Eyedropper \i'-drop-ur\: A clumsy ophthalmologist.

Heroes \hee'-rhos\: What a guy in a boat does.

Left Bank \left' bangk\: What the robber did when his bag was full of cash.

Misty \mis'-tee\: How some golfers create divots.

Paradox \par'-uh-doks\: Two physicians

Parasites \par'-uh-sites\: What you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.

Pharmacist \farm'-uh-sist\: A helper on the farm.

Polarize \po'-lur-ize\: What penguins see with.

Primate \pri'-mate\: Removing your spouse from in front of the TV.

Relief \ree-leef'\: What trees do in the spring.

Rubberneck \rub'-er-nek\: What you do to relax your wife.

Seamstress \seem'-stres\: Describes 250 pounds in a size 6.

Selfish \sel'-fish\: What the owner of a seafood store does.

Subdued \sub-dood'\: Like, a guy, like, works on one of those, like, submarines, man.

Sudafed \sood'-a-fed\: Bringing litigation against the government.
 
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