If these dont make you feel like a PC wizard I dont know what will!

1. Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press
Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the "Any" key is.

2. AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard
to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic
bag the mouse was packaged in.

3. Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to fax
anything. After 40 minutes of troubleshooting, the technician discovered
the man was trying to fax a piece of paper- by holding it in front of the
monitor screen and hitting the "Send" key.

4. Yet another, Dell customer called to complain that his keyboard no
longer worked. He had cleaned it by filling up his tub with soap and water
and soaking the keyboard for a day, then removing all the keys and washing
them individually.

5. A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was enraged
because his computer had told him he was "Bad and an invalid." The tech
explained that the computer's "bad command" and "invalid" responses
shouldn't be taken personally.

6. A confused caller to IBM was having trouble printing documents. He told
the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't find printer." The
user had also tried turning the computer screen to face the printer-but
that his computer still couldn't "see" the printer.

7. An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get her
new Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was plugged in, the
technician asked her what happened when she pushed the power button. Her
response, "I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and nothing happens."
The "foot pedal "turned out to be the computer's mouse.

8. Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand new
computer wouldn't work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged it in and
sat there for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When asked what
happened when she pressed the power switch, she asked, "What power
switch?"

9. Another IBM customer had trouble installing software and rang for
support. "I put in the first disk, and that was OK. It said to put in the
second disk, and had some problems with the disk. When it said to put in
the third disk, I couldn't even fit it in..." The user hadn't realized
that "Insert Disk 2" implied to remove Disk 1 first.


10. A story from a Novell NetWire SysOp:
CALLER: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"
TECH: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"
CALLER: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty
period. How do I go about getting that fixed?"
TECH: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"
CALLER: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
TECH: "Please excuse me. If I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am.
Did you receive this as part of a promotional at a trade show?
How did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark
on it?"
CALLER: "It came with my computer. I don't know anything about a
promotional. It just has '4X' on it."
At this point, the Tech Rep had to mute the caller because
he couldn't stand it. He was laughing too hard. The caller had
been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder
and snapped it off the drive.


11. A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
the tech asked her if she was "running it under windows." The woman responded,
"No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man
sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window and his printer is working
fine."

12. And last but not least:
TECH SUPPORT: "O.K. Bob, let's press the control and escape keys
at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager."
CUSTOMER: "I don't have a 'P'".
TECH SUPPORT: "On your keyboard, Bob."
CUSTOMER: "What do you mean?"
SUPPORT: " 'P' on your keyboard, Bob."
CUSTOMER: "I ain't gonna do that

 

ROFL!!!

 

I have seen the cup holder bit from experience while in computer classes. I think we all have moments of stupidity everyonce in a while. Also if you spill a soda in your keyboard. Mix up some warm soap and water in a 5 gallon bucket. Then submerge your keyboard in the bucket. After about 20 minutes take the keyboard out and fill the bucket up with clean water and rinse it off. Then wait about 3 or 4 days and let it dry. That sometimes will take care of the stuck keys on a keyboard. I know that one works from experience. Hard drives don't last for more than about 4 years on average. Sometimes you can put a dead hard drive in the freezer in a ziploc bag for a couple of hours and it will come back to working for a few minutes so you can get your data off of it.

 

http://www.techtales.com/


hours of laughs!

 

I worked at Staples back in college a few moons ago and I had guy that was DEAD SERIOUS when he said... "Oh... it comes with a drink holder too?" Of course, he was referring to the CD ROM... I just about lost it... then I realized he was DEAD serious.... *shrugs*

 

some people need to be shot.

 

I have people like that all the time, well maybe not that drastic, ask me questions about computers at work. They come up and ask you about a computer and when you tell them they have this stupid look on their face. Like I had one customer the other day ask me about a computer and she asked what the CD-RW stood for. I told her that it was a CD burner. Then she asked me what it done. I told her that she could copy CD's and make her own CD's. She was like "WOW, you can make your CD's now?" I was like yep, and now you can even make your own DVD's with the DVD burner. She was freaked out by that.

I like the ones that come up and ask about the computers and say that all they want it for is to do email and things like that. I tell them that every computer on the market will let you do email if you are online. Then they ask me if they could still surf the internet with the computer. Or they tell me that they want to do their bank accounts and other little things on the internet with it. I just tell them as long as you have the internet, you can do all of those things and more. I just feel like calling them stupid or something, but I don't want to lose my job. Some people are just idiots.

 

From a lot of those responses in the first post it sure sounds like a lot of the stupid people are the ones buying Dell…

DUDE, you got a Dell…

 

I can't believe that nobody made fun of me for spelling computer wrong.

 

I just figured you spelled it wrong on purpose

 

I didn't even notice you misspelled computer.LOL

 

Yeah... That's the ticket. I meant to do that.

 

I thought about it and then decided against it...

 

I had a woman that called one day to tell me she ran out of mouse pad and could not click on one of her icons. She put in a request for a bigger one