Minivan KILL...
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From: NH
Minivan KILL...
I have got to tell this story:
Today I am cruising, you know bouncing on 17” rolling with the wind down the turnpike, (those on the west coast that means “freeway”). Anyhow I am cruising doing just a little over the speed limit, living on dangers edge, got my AC/DC cranked WAY up, basically begging for a ticket but watching very closely for state trooper’s (those on the west coast that means the cops that cruse the freeways)
Well I come up to the toll booths (those on the west coast that’s where they stick it to us east coast for money to pay for the turnpike, and a great place for the state troopers to nail you for something stupid) I pay my extortion fee and proceed forward. This is a two lane that in about 2 miles turns into a one lane so sometimes competition is stiff. As I pull out of the extortion gate there is a dude driving a mommy’s bus (minivan) and this ol’ boy has got the revolutions just maxed out on his machine that’s bouncing on I believe 15”, could have been 13” or 14”.
I am thinking WTF is this all about the dudes ride is the color maroon and my truck is silver and everyone knows silver is the fastest freaking color on the road today, I mean damn my silver 4.2 XLT would blow the doors off some white Lightning any day of the week, its all to do with the color (ok reality check, my 4.2 won’t blow the doors off a white Lightning, but it will give it a run for the money LOL).
I let the guy get a bit of a lead because I want to check for stickers to insure he don’t have an unfair horse power advantage over me. I would hate to get my *** handed to me by a freaking minivan sporting 50 plus horsepower in stickers. I check and no stickers so it’s a go.
I go to get on it and this boy must be thinking he just entered the Daytona Super Speedway. I am thinking from the sound of his minibus that he is banging like 8,000 RPM so I am thinking “Damn I hope that thing don’t have V-TEK” I figure screw it because I don’t have anyone with me so I can always deny a loss.
Since I have the 5-speed I down shift to 3rd gear and get on it. DAMN this puppy does have some power (when the RPM’s are about 2,000 its got some go) I start pulling away like nutting, go to 4th and just unload on this boy because I am thinking ”You are going to look at my Zaino shine in the tailgate” I have to say I was impressed I had it to 100mph and only about 3,300 RPM’s and that’s in 4th gear.
It was no match must have been like 15 car lengths in I would say ˝ mile if that. You could tell he was happy as hell looking at my Zaino shine in the tailgate because once traffic slowed he was jumping up and down like in excitement, you could almost hear him say ”Damn that thing shines like a mother” I am sure his buddy was telling him if his miniwussmobile had been silver and my truck maroon that he would have handed my *** to me.
Moral of the story: When you want to insure victory in a race make sure you either have a silver vehicle or at least that the one your racing is NOT silver or be prepared for a whooping…
Today I am cruising, you know bouncing on 17” rolling with the wind down the turnpike, (those on the west coast that means “freeway”). Anyhow I am cruising doing just a little over the speed limit, living on dangers edge, got my AC/DC cranked WAY up, basically begging for a ticket but watching very closely for state trooper’s (those on the west coast that means the cops that cruse the freeways)
Well I come up to the toll booths (those on the west coast that’s where they stick it to us east coast for money to pay for the turnpike, and a great place for the state troopers to nail you for something stupid) I pay my extortion fee and proceed forward. This is a two lane that in about 2 miles turns into a one lane so sometimes competition is stiff. As I pull out of the extortion gate there is a dude driving a mommy’s bus (minivan) and this ol’ boy has got the revolutions just maxed out on his machine that’s bouncing on I believe 15”, could have been 13” or 14”.
I am thinking WTF is this all about the dudes ride is the color maroon and my truck is silver and everyone knows silver is the fastest freaking color on the road today, I mean damn my silver 4.2 XLT would blow the doors off some white Lightning any day of the week, its all to do with the color (ok reality check, my 4.2 won’t blow the doors off a white Lightning, but it will give it a run for the money LOL).
I let the guy get a bit of a lead because I want to check for stickers to insure he don’t have an unfair horse power advantage over me. I would hate to get my *** handed to me by a freaking minivan sporting 50 plus horsepower in stickers. I check and no stickers so it’s a go.
I go to get on it and this boy must be thinking he just entered the Daytona Super Speedway. I am thinking from the sound of his minibus that he is banging like 8,000 RPM so I am thinking “Damn I hope that thing don’t have V-TEK” I figure screw it because I don’t have anyone with me so I can always deny a loss.
Since I have the 5-speed I down shift to 3rd gear and get on it. DAMN this puppy does have some power (when the RPM’s are about 2,000 its got some go) I start pulling away like nutting, go to 4th and just unload on this boy because I am thinking ”You are going to look at my Zaino shine in the tailgate” I have to say I was impressed I had it to 100mph and only about 3,300 RPM’s and that’s in 4th gear.
It was no match must have been like 15 car lengths in I would say ˝ mile if that. You could tell he was happy as hell looking at my Zaino shine in the tailgate because once traffic slowed he was jumping up and down like in excitement, you could almost hear him say ”Damn that thing shines like a mother” I am sure his buddy was telling him if his miniwussmobile had been silver and my truck maroon that he would have handed my *** to me.
Moral of the story: When you want to insure victory in a race make sure you either have a silver vehicle or at least that the one your racing is NOT silver or be prepared for a whooping…
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Lol! Great story 01. 
Congrats on the kill, even if it was a mini-van wussmobile.
Ask any racer, any real racer...it doesn't matter if you win by an inch or a mile.... winning is winning. I figured I had to throw a quote from the Fast and the Furious in there somewhere. LOL. 
Congrats on the kill, even if it was a mini-van wussmobile. Ask any racer, any real racer...it doesn't matter if you win by an inch or a mile.... winning is winning. I figured I had to throw a quote from the Fast and the Furious in there somewhere. LOL.
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From: Whitehorse, Yukon
Nice story Burt, great kill!
Your story kinda made me remember an incident racing a Dodge minivan.
When I saw this guy, I had to do a double take because I couldnt believe my eyes.
I first spotted this kid in my rear view mirror dodging, weaving, and just driving like an idiot to catch up to me.
You know the kind of guy I'm trying to describe, the type who has his foot all the way to the floor, and drives as fast as he can, weaving in and out, cutting people off, just an all around impatient ******* whose neck you would love to wring.
So I see this clown almost cause a bunch of accidents, and he finally catches up to me, and is in the lane to my left (we are both stopped at a redlight)
His van is bright red, and he has the headlight blackouts on, man I started laughing so hard. He also had one of those cheap $99 pop up sunroofs (I'm trying to paint a picture here)
So I look over, and it's some punk assed kid wearing a sideways baseball cap, haha, dark shades on, and cheap stereo pumping out distorted rap music for everyone to hear. So I'm thinking to myself (man, if only you could see how retarded you look)
So buddy and I are waiting for the light to change, but he keeps inching up past the line, the light is red, but over half of his ugly van is in the middle of the intersection because he's too impatient to wait for the light to change.
By the time the light turned green, he was almost a full length ahead of me, and he stomps on it. Well I stomped on it too, and was ahead of him in a nano second, LOL
I mean, it was no contest, I handed him his *** (not that i'm proud of it because it wasnt anything to brag about) but it still felt great because of the type of ahole he was.
We come to the next red light, and he does it again (I'm thinking "you want some more punk?" So we run again with the same results (no chance for the kid driving mommas minivan)
At the last set of lights, he does it again, but I already proved my point, so I didnt waste a WOT on him, just drove normal.
I'm sure after he drove past me, he started bragging to all his ricer pals about his kill.
Those guys are all the same, if they "pass" you, they consider it a kill.
I don't have anything against minivans, hey, we used to own one, but don't try to make it look sporty because it just doesnt wash. It's like putting a silk hat on a pig.
Habibi
Your story kinda made me remember an incident racing a Dodge minivan.
When I saw this guy, I had to do a double take because I couldnt believe my eyes.
I first spotted this kid in my rear view mirror dodging, weaving, and just driving like an idiot to catch up to me.
You know the kind of guy I'm trying to describe, the type who has his foot all the way to the floor, and drives as fast as he can, weaving in and out, cutting people off, just an all around impatient ******* whose neck you would love to wring.
So I see this clown almost cause a bunch of accidents, and he finally catches up to me, and is in the lane to my left (we are both stopped at a redlight)
His van is bright red, and he has the headlight blackouts on, man I started laughing so hard. He also had one of those cheap $99 pop up sunroofs (I'm trying to paint a picture here)
So I look over, and it's some punk assed kid wearing a sideways baseball cap, haha, dark shades on, and cheap stereo pumping out distorted rap music for everyone to hear. So I'm thinking to myself (man, if only you could see how retarded you look)
So buddy and I are waiting for the light to change, but he keeps inching up past the line, the light is red, but over half of his ugly van is in the middle of the intersection because he's too impatient to wait for the light to change.
By the time the light turned green, he was almost a full length ahead of me, and he stomps on it. Well I stomped on it too, and was ahead of him in a nano second, LOL
I mean, it was no contest, I handed him his *** (not that i'm proud of it because it wasnt anything to brag about) but it still felt great because of the type of ahole he was.
We come to the next red light, and he does it again (I'm thinking "you want some more punk?" So we run again with the same results (no chance for the kid driving mommas minivan)
At the last set of lights, he does it again, but I already proved my point, so I didnt waste a WOT on him, just drove normal.
I'm sure after he drove past me, he started bragging to all his ricer pals about his kill.
Those guys are all the same, if they "pass" you, they consider it a kill.
I don't have anything against minivans, hey, we used to own one, but don't try to make it look sporty because it just doesnt wash. It's like putting a silk hat on a pig.
Habibi
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From: NH
paulv107:
Not smoking anything LMAO, Yep, it's true about the color silver just ask Fast Gator...
Peacemaker:
True a win is a win, but nothing like stomping a minivan...
Habibi:
Thats funny...
Not smoking anything LMAO, Yep, it's true about the color silver just ask Fast Gator...
Peacemaker:
True a win is a win, but nothing like stomping a minivan...
Habibi:
Thats funny...
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From: Stinkin Joisey
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From: NH
Originally posted by Peacemaker
Dang.My truck is dark blue....no wonder I can't beat anything.
Dang.My truck is dark blue....no wonder I can't beat anything.
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From: NH
Originally posted by Peacemaker
Dude....I saw some really cool NOS window stickers at AutoZone. I bet I could burn my rear tires off like a **** with those.
Dude....I saw some really cool NOS window stickers at AutoZone. I bet I could burn my rear tires off like a **** with those.
