Blonde joke
Thread Starter
|
Senior Member
Joined: Dec 2001
Posts: 567
Likes: 0
From: Hazel Park, MI
Blonde joke
My little sister (12) told me this one. I thought it was good.
A blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid & hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree & told him "I've kidnapped you". She then wrote a note saying "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a papaer bag & put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, A Blonde"
The blonde then pinned the note to the kid's shirt & sent him home to show his parents.
The next morning the blonde checked & sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree.
The blonde opened the bag & found the $10,000 with a note that said "How could you do this to a fellow blonde?"
A blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid & hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree & told him "I've kidnapped you". She then wrote a note saying "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a papaer bag & put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, A Blonde"
The blonde then pinned the note to the kid's shirt & sent him home to show his parents.
The next morning the blonde checked & sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree.
The blonde opened the bag & found the $10,000 with a note that said "How could you do this to a fellow blonde?"
Senior Member
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 12,632
Likes: 1
From: Stinkin Joisey
LOL Why did the blonde climb the chain link fence?
?
??
???
????
?????
??????
???????
????????
?????????
??????????
???????????
??????????
?????????
????????
???????
??????
?????
????
???
??
?
To see whats on the other side!
Member
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 18
Likes: 0
From: Morgantown, WV
My wife is not blonde, but
Those are good (My son's girlfriend is blonde and you can bet she'll hear these next time I see her.
My wife is not blonde, but – True story. While my wife and I were dating we decided to go to a WVU football game. We had one ticket and decided we could pick up another from one of the people buying and selling tickets on the way into the stadium. As we approached one of the “sellers” I asked if he had any tickets and how much they were. The seller replied $14.00. Not wanting to pay face value for the ticket and knowing the game had already started, I told the guy I only had $10.00 and asked if would he sell me the ticket for $10.00. (Of course I had more money, but I knew the guy wanted to unload the tickets because the game had already started). The man agreed on $10.00, and as I was reaching into my pocket to hand the man a ten dollar bill, my wife (girlfriend at the time) pipes up behind me and says here I have four ones. Needless to say I married her anyway.
My wife is not blonde, but – True story. While my wife and I were dating we decided to go to a WVU football game. We had one ticket and decided we could pick up another from one of the people buying and selling tickets on the way into the stadium. As we approached one of the “sellers” I asked if he had any tickets and how much they were. The seller replied $14.00. Not wanting to pay face value for the ticket and knowing the game had already started, I told the guy I only had $10.00 and asked if would he sell me the ticket for $10.00. (Of course I had more money, but I knew the guy wanted to unload the tickets because the game had already started). The man agreed on $10.00, and as I was reaching into my pocket to hand the man a ten dollar bill, my wife (girlfriend at the time) pipes up behind me and says here I have four ones. Needless to say I married her anyway.
Thread Starter
|
Senior Member
Joined: Dec 2001
Posts: 567
Likes: 0
From: Hazel Park, MI
nice story
Here's another one she just sent me.
A blonde calls her husband at work & asks him if he can help her when he gets home from work.
He says "Sure. Whats the problem?"
She replies "Well I started a really hard puzzle & I can't even find a single edge piece."
He says "Look on the box, there's always a picture of what the puzzle is on the box."
She says "Its a big rooster."
The husband arrives home from work looks at the "puzzle" & tells his wife "Okay put the corn flakes back in the box."
Here's another one she just sent me.
A blonde calls her husband at work & asks him if he can help her when he gets home from work.
He says "Sure. Whats the problem?"
She replies "Well I started a really hard puzzle & I can't even find a single edge piece."
He says "Look on the box, there's always a picture of what the puzzle is on the box."
She says "Its a big rooster."
The husband arrives home from work looks at the "puzzle" & tells his wife "Okay put the corn flakes back in the box."
Junior Member
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 5
Likes: 0
A blind man enters a Ladies Bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar
stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the
bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet. In a very deep, husky
voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, you should
know 5 things:
1 - The bartender is a blonde girl.
2 - The bouncer is a blonde gal.
3 - I'm a 6 foot tall, 200 pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4 - The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weightlifter.
5 - The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares:
"Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it 5 times.
stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the
bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet. In a very deep, husky
voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, you should
know 5 things:
1 - The bartender is a blonde girl.
2 - The bouncer is a blonde gal.
3 - I'm a 6 foot tall, 200 pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4 - The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weightlifter.
5 - The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares:
"Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it 5 times.
Trending Topics
Junior Member
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 5
Likes: 0
A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse, unassisted, and the horse immediately springs into motion.
It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle.
In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip.
She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway.
Finally, giving up her frail grip, the blonde attempts to leap away from the horse and throw herself to safety.
Unfortunately her foot has become entangled in the stirrup, she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground over and over.
As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousness when to her great fortune....
Frank, the Walmart greeter, sees her and unplugs the horse.