Im half the man I used to be!!

 

Stone Temple Pilots right?

 

"Superman isn't the only one that can fly!"

 

"I got a problem here, bladder say's I gotta go, but huuuuuh?"

 

Using a payphone costs an arm and a leg; two legs for long distance.

 

Look, when the Amazing Marvo asked for a member of the audience to help him demonstrate "Sawing a Man in Half", I assumed that he knew how to put me back together.

 

Hello Expiedia? I'm not happy with my half-price airfare.

 

This isn't what I had in mind when they said "Let your fingers do the walking"









By the way RockPick thanks for the second place ranking. When can I expect to receive my free bottle of Zaino? uh I mean meguiar's. LOL




Great Thread. Thanks for the laughs

 

Hello, Jerry Springer? That's right, Jerry, I left my better half in the car.

 

You know what you call a guy with no legs hanging on a wall?

Art!!!
get it?
Art!!!

 

Hello Mom? You know when you told me not to go to Afganistan, well........

 

Information? Could I get the number to lost and found?

 

Sadly, Tom didn't realize just how bad the gangs were in New York when he realized that he wasn't just pick-pocketed.

Jenn in OH

 

well when the a$$ kickin contest started i knew i was ***** outta luck

 

Hello Operator? Yeah I got cut off.