I've got a '97 F-150 XLT extended cab, short bed, 4.6L (281 CI) V8, and I'm wandering what can I do to increase performance? I'm not looking to go 200 mph, but I want it to get up and go when I push on the pedal.

From the start, replacing the engine / transmission / anything over $500 is not an option.

What can I get to increase my performance, and how easy is what you are recommending to buy / install, people keep saying "Oh, just get a performance chip". Well, when I walk into an auto parts store and ask for a performance chip, they laugh at me, please please please be specific.

 

Get a tuner. SCT tuner. Best power you're gonna get for under $500. Could even get a custom tune also and still be fine. I'd suggest MPT.

 

Find some PI heads from a 2000+ 4.6 2v. That'll help.
LT headers
A custom tuned programmer (not something you can just go down to your parts store and buy)
Regear front and rear end
Gotts intake mod
E-fans
Super charger
Turbo
5.4 swap
The list goes on and on

 

That's because they aren't chips anymore, their considered programmers, and like I stated i wouldn't buy one from your local parts store.

 

This. For the price your looking at, a SCT tuner with a custom tune is the best option.
Problem is even with a tuner your still not going to get that much more power, and will require premium fuel for best performance.

 

Biggest bang for the buck will be a set of 2000 or newer heads and intake. That should net you around 25 to 30 HP. That is more than any programmer. Programmer would be next. Like Lariat said, the list is long on what you can do, but from where your starting at the PI change over will net the most bang for the buck with your budget.